..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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