Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
