Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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