Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
