What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
