You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
