i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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