I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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