How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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