fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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