I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm like, not good at living.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
