Need sex. Gaining weight.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
