Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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