Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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