i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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