just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
