I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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