It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
