that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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