the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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