Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
