absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
