So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize
