wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
