I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Randomize
