Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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