How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
