but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
