We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize