P.S. I can't hear my feet
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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