I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
soo... how was my night?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
