Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
