She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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