I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
