i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
There are leaves in my underwear?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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