Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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