I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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