if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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