I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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