My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
