Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
