To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i will never coherently bang her
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
