Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
