All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
