...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
you never un-have a 4some
Ladies don't puke and tell
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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