The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
