Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize