i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
