Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I know her cup size but not her name....
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
