Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
YAS. BRING CRAB.
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